Just Another Day on the Island.

Island life... I love it! Don't tell any of the long-time islanders that we live in a small town. They will protest and say we live in the fifth largest community in Alaska (we used to be the fourth largest, but were surpassed by Wasilla last year). While that is technically true, our community is small enough that the year-round residents all know one another. And if we don't know you personally, we at least know OF you. So I was rather surprised when I attempted to pay my telephone and electric bill at the KPU office today. I walked up to the counter, like I always do, and the Newbie (who was on a personal phone call, btw. ) asked me for the phone number on my accounts. I gave it to her and handed her my debit card. "Um, first and last name?" I gave her my name. "Um, you are not on this account." I told her my husband's name. "You can't pay for this account, because your name is not on it." I told her I always pay this account, as my husband works during their opening hours (he used to be the Engineering Manager for KPU for God's sake!!!!) "Well, I can not tell you the balance of the account, because you are not on it." I told her I did not need to hear the balance; just to swipe my card and pay for whatever the balance was. "Sorry, you can't pay for the account." I asked her if she knew who I was (obviously she did not). I told her everyone else in the office would know who I am (she was not inclined to go ask anyone) I asked for her supervisor. "She is out to lunch." I told the Dingbat KPU would not be getting their payment today, laughed at her and walked out. The Customer Service Award of the year most definitely will NOT go to Ketchikan Public Utilities. Wherever did they find this idiot? And who, pray tell, trained her on her customer service skills? I know I can be difficult to deal with at times (and the whole island knows that too); I am no longer allowed to call the local Well's Fargo branch, because apparently my deep seeded hatred for banks and all they represent, and the constant fuck-ups of Wells Fargo make for a very volatile combination. But hey, I was being very nice to this Doofenschmirtz at KPU and just wanted to give her my money! I am certain this little exchange will make its way through the grapevine. All was not lost though. My day was by far more special and exciting than yours! Why? Because I got to witness the miracle of life! At ten till six, I got a call notifying me that my friend Cami was having contractions close together and I needed to get my ass over to the hospital. I am very honored that Cami asked me to be present at the birth of my Godson, Daniel, so I suited up for the chilly night and walked over to the hospital.

You know you're Alaskan when your boots are made of moosehide and your hat is made of harbor seal and sea otter (suck on that PETA!) When I rang the bell at labor and delivery, the nurse told me to come in and "show my hands". I had a serious WTF-moment, but figured they had some weird new security rule, so I walk in with my hands up like a criminal. "No, GEL your hands! GEL, GEL!" I am happy to report they just wanted me to sanitize my dirty paws, not come in with my hands up! My reputation isn't quite as bad as I imagined. It was hilarious to be recognized by the nurse and the midwife though! They asked me how I liked being on "the other side" of the bed for a change (I've had 2 kids here in the past 20 months). At just before seven, we welcomed precious baby Daniel into the world!

So glad you are here, baby Daniel. Your mommy picked your Godmother well; the whole island knows I will never let anything bad happen to you.